Unmotivated

These few weeks have been a bit of a bored in the office, well not to say there is nothing to do or anything, there is plentiful to be done and accomplished. But is just that people in the department is kinda losing the edge, one after another leaving. It does affect the atmosphere of office.



I thought it wouldn't affect me, I am all tough and emotional-less, but I think it does start to slowly creep into my feeling. I do sometimes thing why didn't I ever let go of such a good offer, and stayed back, when in front of me everything seems to be not going well. But yet I strongly feel in my heart I should stay. And that is what I did.

I am trying really hard to stay calm and strong in my workplace, but is just not easy.

Do keep me in prayer. I have always think that I can go far here at Proton. I believe.

I'm still yet to post...

... my Pictures from Hong Kong.



I have been procrastinating over putting it up. Mostly because of work stress, and tension at work. Really very hard to cope. Mainly caused by the political drama and the mindset of people in the office, that recession is hitting us, and we will not be able to make it!

Oh come on! Stop those lousy complaint and do something about it!

I strongly believe 1 person can make a difference! I know I will do my best to make the change and shift!

Ok! I am seriously losing it, so many things in my head, Been having major headaches literally lately just thinking about it. Most people only start year 2009 after CNY, here is where we go full throttle. Well most meaning the hardworking people, some don't even care until the day they die. =P

Life at PROTON is really starting to get very interesting.

Happy Birthday To Me

29th Dec 2007!

Is my birthday! I have been receiving phone messages one after another wishing me Happy Birthday. That really made my day. But the saddest thing is, they don't declare public holiday on your birthday. I am doom to be at work on a Saturday.

Ever since we kick off Youth '08, our working hours have been extended to Saturdays. At 1st it was from 2.30pm - 5.30pm. Then till 7.30pm and now because of the final few moments in history to venture into a new frontier of youth lifestyle. We are working from 10am till God knows what time. I am feeling a little dreadful about working now, but well duty is a duty. I got to accomplish it.

My boss once told me, you got to see your job as something that you own, not a task, this quote has been ringing in my ear ever since. I been thinking, normally when we want to own something, won't that thing 1st interest us and the next won't it be a pleasure having that thing that you own?

Well is not that I am complaining that I don't like what I am doing, but the amount of politics and tension cause in the whole commotion of Youth '08 have been a big disturbance to the ownership of my work. People say a person's true self appear under pressure, well it is true, really scary what people can do to you to achieve what they want.

I have always thought that team work pays off, but somehow I feel I rather work alone. At least I get things done the way I want it. I know that will put more burden on myself, which that is what I am feeling right now. But after so many things happening, I just can't trust people anymore. Sigh!!

Politics! Office politic!!

For 23 years of my life, it has became a norm now, work is work! So I just got to live with it. So far only 1 colleague remember my birthday. Really feel appreciated right?

Happy Birthday Jeff.

Friday Blues

You know how every Monday we come to work feeling very moody and such?

I am feeling it this morning.

I got into my car, pop in a Jay Chow CD, and start playing those emo songs, went up to the office and straight away blog about it. I dread today, is probably due to yesterday's issue about the warning letter.

I feel like quiting, pack my bags and go to Singapore (I am starting to like Singapore) to start a career. I mean Malaysian designers don't get a good pay. I did a small market survey that day, researching on the average pay a Malaysian company would offer a designer. Guess what? The statistics shows that a lowest pay for a full time designer is RM800 and the highest on a senior level is only RM3500. That's what a 1st salary a fresh engineer graduates gets. OMG! We are under paid.

All the stress put upon our shoulders, and the amount of unclaimable OTs we put into doing our work. The least being appreciated, and the frequent cutting cost on our projects. How to survive this industry in Malaysia? Compared to other countries outside Malaysia, most designers are paid bucket loads. And the designs they generate are simply superb. I mean they have all the source of income to do so. We hardly can survive in this industry, and still the value of everything else is increasing. We might as well pack our bags and leave. Sigh!!!

But still the passion of a creative person burns inside me, keeping me so long in this industry. We can make a difference. Let's just hope the world sees it soon.

Is Friday is Friday... Friday blues...

A "Merry" Christmas

I guess everyone is happy because it is Christmas.

I went to Singapore for Christmas this year, Orchard road was fill with lights and people were all around, crowding the street for the Christmas countdown. I was one of those few who were being sandwich in between human sweat and fragrant odors. And not to say, those Foam bubble cans which causes a foam bubble attacks where we can purchase 6 for S$ 10.

But it was fun...

Until reality strikes when I came back to work on the 27th Dec. Apparently I was being called into the HR office for a talking session. Those talking session can really be scary.

I was being told that my leave wasn't approve, and the whole issue about must have black and white approval, just telling my boss I am taking leave is not enough. And because of that I got a warning letter.

A warning LETTER??!!!

For something that could have been solve easily? I inform my superior 2 weeks ago and then a week before my leave my boss says that he wants to think about it, I mean what is there to think about? Just sign that bloody leave form. But no...

He had to wait till the very last day, when all is being planned and done, all my stuff is booked. And he comes telling me he can't approve my leave. Ok fine, I explain properly and say that I have to go as things are already planned. He ignores me and totally didn't bother, and still trying to get my colleague to ask me to work.

So after bursting my tempers the whole day, I call him at night (I was quite ok by then) to inquire about my leave, he says since you booked everything already then go ahead. So fine. He say it so I went.

And now things has turned this way??!!

I now have a warning letter and 2 days unpaid leave. Gee thanks!

Merry Christmas to you.